Sunday, July 1, 2007

I am a worm, hear me roar

Boyhood - they say you should be done away with this at an early age, or it causes a catastrophe if it surfaces when you grow up. At times, adult life can seem a bit difficult, especially when you pass through such childish phases along the way, much like a worm (caterpillar, say) who leaves the cocoon and spreads out its wings. You leave your own little universe and enter a very complex system, where things aren't being started from scratch, but an art whose elements play well defined roles to create the bigger picture. Most often such ambitious new entrants into the system fill in cracks and niches in the same - ending up doing something believing they and the role were meant for each other.

I don't quite know what I am - a worm or a fly; maybe I am one wing out of my cocoon yet, alternating between re-entering the cocoon and trying to spread my wings out of it and explore all those things that I can never find inside there. We live in a world where we look upon change in the same way Houdini would have looked upon at his padlocked boxes - first try to wiggle free from it, and surrender only if you cannot escape. I believe we all share a strength - of taking control of our own story than succumbing to one scripted by others. I take it from whatever little I have seen of life so far, that each one of us realises this strength in our own capacity and benefits from the same accordingly; to each his own success.

Brainstorming, debates, chitchatting, talks, sermons, advice - how many ways do we seek to reconcile our past, our life with what we aim to be, with what we should be. We seek information and review our life in the light of the same and ever more try to improve upon it. But all this that we do, everything we think of, isn't this all biased? Don't we all inherit biases when we interact with new acquaintances? No matter how original one may think one is, the very fact that you are thinking so might be inherited after all. Being original isn't about doing something out of the way - I say it is more about defying what others think you are. The introvert person may become more outgoing, the screw up would become more careful, the fickle minded may learn focus. Isn't this what self definition is all about? - making your own story? A willful and a well-informed way of living that has its roots in our past, is nourished by out present, and seeks to reach out to the bright sun of future?

Maybe I have come far enough where I know what I am doing and the world should appreciate what I do. I am here to shake off the chains of whatever labels the world may have assigned me -I don't want to be identified as Mr. Achieve-all, or Mr. Studious or Mr. Dreamer and the like - maybe I want to leave these behind me yet never forget them. Maybe I do not need to follow the path that thousands of souls have been following all along; maybe I am made for something big, something never thought of before, something of my own. I may be a worm, but hear me roar.


Bastet said...

well written! Hope u achieve all tht u r setting out to! :) will wait for tht roar, buddy, better make that loud! :)

Shrek said...

@CB: Thank you... and sure will :)